New Pinch

I am not sure how much more I will be able to blog in the coming months...my college is going to reopen day after tomorrow. Still I am planning to have atleast 3 posts a month. Its a crucial year in my studies as I have to prepare for 5 main papers (actually its 4 but last year's paper was a mess so I am improving). It was a memorable summer vacation, lot of tragedies & losses. Anyway seems like I have learnt a lot of things, most striking of all is that "I am saying goodbye to last minute studies." I just hope this lesson doesn't wither away like my new year resolutions which I never keep.
                  Feels like I am having a new beginning. Maybe its because of all the new things I got for college year. Its a silly habit I am having from kindergarten classes onwards. Each school year I want the first day of school to be perfect. Perfect means new pencils,bag, water bottle,shoes & so & so......Anyway I have kept the list of new things to the minimum this year. I have mentioned this earlier in my blog that most of my classmates are from poor families. Sometimes I feel guilty while I buy new shoes or clothes just for the reason that it looks pretty. I have seen some of my classmates using their shoes till they can't be repaired further. They buy things out of necessity, not just because they look pretty or pink. Even though I am saying things like this, I still buy stuff as my father is paying for it. When the day comes, in which I am the person who is paying bills, I will definitely cut back on buying pretty things. Each day I spend with my classmates, makes me more aware of the value of money & I take care not to waste it. I just wish, I will have not too much money or too little money, but just the right amount to balance it all. Till this day money has never been my motivation, I  hope it will stay that way.

Living in the shadow of dreams

As I took shelter from the scorching sun

Under the shadow of a tree

I take shelter under the shadow of my dreams

To cool a scorching mind

The departure of loved ones is hard to bear

And what if the departure is forever

Never ever to see their faces

Never ever to hear them call me pet names

But I dream about them

The only possible way I have

To see them again & listen to them

At least to believe in their existence

For a fraction of a second

I pray every night to God

Let me dream about the dead

Dead who were dear to me once

When they were alive and breathing

Sometimes I become blessed, or am I lucky

To dream of my loved ones in heaven

And I wake up, thanking God right away

Repeating my prayer

Let me dream about my loved ones, once more

And I live in the shadow of my dreams

My friends say, that its wistful dreams

But if it gives me peace of mind

Who is to say nay to it?